S1:E1 5 Powerful Lessons for Healing and Growth

In this episode of the Flourishing After Adversity podcast, host Laura Mangum Broome shares five transformative lessons she learned after enduring a series of life-changing events, including breast cancer, the loss of her teenage son to suicide, a heart transplant, and a divorce. 

These practical steps include processing emotions, adopting a victor mindset, focusing on controllable aspects, taking small steps forward, and practicing daily gratitude. Laura's insights offer a roadmap to turn setbacks into opportunities for growth and healing. Additionally, her free guide, 'Reframe the Spiral,' is offered to help listeners shift negative thoughts and reclaim their day.

00:00 Introduction to Flourishing After Adversity
00:48 Free Guide to Shift Negative Thoughts
01:14 Laura's Personal Story of Adversity
02:18 Lesson 1: Process Your Emotions
03:17 Lesson 2: Be a Victor, Not a Victim
04:02 Lesson 3: Focus on What You Can Control
06:18 Lesson 4: Take Small Steps Forward
06:53 Lesson 5: Practice Daily Gratitude
07:39 Recap of the Five Powerful Lessons
08:24 Final Thoughts and Encouragement
08:54 Closing Remarks and Call to Action

Free Resource: Reframe the Spiral: 5 Quick Coping Strategies to Shift Negative Thoughts and Reclaim Your Day https://www.icope2hope.com/reframe

Website: iCope2Hope: From Hardship to Hope https://www.icope2hope.com

Free Paperback: Flourishing After Adversity (Pay only $4.99 shipping; U.S. Orders Only) https://www.icope2hope.com/freebook 

Transcript

Introduction to Flourishing After Adversity

Welcome to the Flourishing After Adversity podcast. I'm your host, Laura Mangum Broome. If you've ever been knocked down by life, grief, illness loss, or unexpected change, you're in the right place. Get ready to turn your setbacks into stepping stones because healing, growth and joy are just the beginning.

In today's episode, I'm sharing five powerful lessons I learned after facing back to back life changing events. These are not just feel good tips, they're practical tools that help me climb out of the hardest season of my life. By the end of this episode, you'll walk away with five clear steps you can use to process your emotions, find your strength, and move forward with hope.

Free Guide to Shift Negative Thoughts

But before we dive in, if you've been stuck in a spiral of negative thoughts, I have something that can help. It's my free guide, "Reframe the Spiral: 5 Quick Coping Strategies to Shift Negative Thoughts and Reclaim Your Day."

These are the same strategies I use to stop the downward spin when life gets hard, and I want to share them with you. You'll find the link in the show notes. Go to https://www.icope2hope.com/reframe

Laura's Personal Story of Adversity

Let me get started with the one question I hear all the time, "How did you get through it?" They're talking about the five year storm that changed everything for me.

Bilateral breast cancer, losing my teenage son to suicide, the passing of my father, a heart transplant from chemo complications and a sudden divorce after 27 years of marriage. These weren't five isolated events. I lost my son during my breast cancer journey. Then a couple of years later, I lost my dad, had a heart transplant and went through a divorce, all within six months.

No, it wasn't easy. I was on a rollercoaster of emotions, grief, gratitude, betrayal, devastation, and anger. But what helped me keep going, what helped me heal were five powerful lessons. These aren't theories. These are survival tools, and if you're in a tough place right now, I hope they serve you like they did me.

Lesson 1: Process Your Emotions

The first one is to process your emotions. When you're hit with loss, whether it's a person, a dream, or your sense of identity, it's natural to feel overwhelmed. What's not helpful is pretending everything's okay. Buried emotions don't disappear. They grow and eventually they erupt often at the wrong time.

For me, processing looked like ugly crying, reading self-help books, journaling and therapy. Naming what I was feeling, gave me power over it. Try this, pause this podcast. Open your notes app and grab a journal. Write right now, "I feel...", and fill in the blank. Let the words flow.

No judgment, no fixing, just honesty. That's not weakness. It's strength. You're making space for healing.

Lesson 2: Be a Victor, Not a Victim

The second lesson is to be a victor, not a victim. I get it. "Why me?" is a common thought when life hits hard. I asked that question often, especially after losing my son and facing betrayal. But one day I looked in the mirror and said, "I have a new heart.

I have a second chance at life, and I will not waste it on a pity party for one." That moment sparked a growth mindset. Victim thinking, keeps you stuck. Victor thinking gives you options. Try this, reframe: "This is hard and I will get through this." Victors don't deny the pain. They rise through it, and you can too.

Lesson 3: Focus on What You Can Control

The third lesson is to focus on what you can control. After my heart transplant and divorce in the middle of a pandemic, my life felt like a junk drawer, chaotic and out of place.

I couldn't control what happened to me,

but I could choose what I focused on. Making my bed, sitting outside and drinking water, I realized I always had control over three things, my thoughts, my words, and my actions. One of the most powerful tools I use came from the book, "The Resilience Factor", by Karen Reivich and Andrew Shatte.

This book became my resilience manual.

The tool is called the A BC method. Martin Seligman, the father of Positive Psychology, includes the letters D and E, so I refer to it as the A through E method.

A stands for adversity. What happened? List the facts. I'll use one of my setbacks as an example. One month after my heart transplant, my husband left me after 27 years of marriage. B stands for belief. What thoughts are stuck on replay? In my situation, I remember thinking, I must be damaged goods from the breast cancer and a heart transplant.

C stands for consequence. What emotions come from that belief? I felt betrayal, abandonment, devastation, and anger.

D stands for dispute. Is that belief even true? No, I'm not damaged goods. I have value and I'm a survivor. E stands for Energize. What Thought Moves you forward? In my situation, I realized I get a second chance at life with my new heart. I'm going to help others overcome setbacks, discover new purpose and flourish in life.

This is the A to E method. Try it. You'll be amazed by your strength.

Lesson 4: Take Small Steps Forward

The fourth lesson is to take small steps forward. When life falls apart, everything feels too far away. So I made a rule one to three small wins each day. Some days that looked like brushing my teeth, other days, texting a friend or scheduling an appointment.

Tiny steps count. Consistent movement builds confidence and momentum. Your challenge, pick one to three small tasks today, Tiny's okay. Just make them achievable.

Lesson 5: Practice Daily Gratitude

And the fifth lesson is to practice gratitude daily, especially on the hard days. Gratitude doesn't erase pain, but it reframes perspective.

It shifts your focus from what you've lost to what you still have. Start small. Write three things you're thankful for before bed. For example, I'm safe, I have clean water. I heard something funny today. Or if it's been an extremely terrible day, try "At least it's not worse." And then name several ways it could be worse.

Trust me, it can always be worse. Those moments are fuel. They keep hope alive.

Recap of the Five Powerful Lessons

Let's go back over the five powerful lessons that help me survive some of the hardest years of my life. And these can help you too. Number one, process your emotions. Let them rise so you can move through them. Two, be a victor, not a victim.

You may not choose the pain, but you choose the path forward. Three, focus on what you can control, your thoughts, your words, your actions. Four, take small steps forward. Consistent steps lead to momentum , and five, practice gratitude daily. Even on the worst days, there's something good left.

Final Thoughts and Encouragement

Of all these, the one I return to the most, processing my emotions. You have to feel it to heal it. So here's my question for you. What's one emotion you can name today? One small or tiny action you can take today? One thing you can be grateful for today. You are not stuck. You're standing at the edge of your next chapter and you're stronger than you think.

You can do this!

Closing Remarks and Call to Action

If today's episode gave you even one "aha" moment, I'd love for you to grab my free guide, "Reframe the Spiral: 5 Quick Coping Strategies to Shift Negative Thoughts and Reclaim Your Day." These are the exact tools I use when life feels heavy. They'll help you interrupt negative thought patterns and get back on track.

Just click the link in the show notes. Go to https://icope2hope.com/reframe

That's it for this episode. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show so you won't miss the next one. And if this episode helped you, it would mean the world to me if you would leave a quick rating or review.

That's how more people can find this message of hope. Even better, share this episode with someone who needs some encouragement. Until next time, remember, adversity can make you bitter or better. Choose better. 

You've got this!